When Love Still Feels Like It’s Not Enough

“When love feels not enough, remember—it’s not the absence of love, but the silence between hearts that needs healing.”

The most difficult relationship, I’ve come to realize, is with the ones I love the most. The people closest to my heart—family, a partner, or even a friend I’d do anything for. It’s strange, isn’t it? You give them your best, in the way you know how, and yet sometimes… it feels like it falls short.

I’ve had moments where I planned something with so much thought—a small surprise, a kind word, or just being there when I thought they needed me—and still, it didn’t land the way I imagined. Instead of appreciation, I was met with disappointment in their eyes. And that stings, more than I can admit.

It makes me wonder—am I not expressing my love in the way they expect? Or am I expecting them to simply see my heart without needing explanation?

I remember once making tea for someone I deeply love, the way I like it—extra ginger, strong, with just a little sweetness. I thought it would warm them, like it warms me. But instead, they frowned, saying, “This isn’t how I like it.” In that tiny moment, something inside me cracked. It wasn’t about the tea. It was about the gap between my gesture and their expectation.

And that’s the reality of love—it’s not always a perfect match of intentions and outcomes. Sometimes, what we give is not what they need. Sometimes, what they need is not what we know how to give.

It makes me ask myself: Do I love them in the way I want to, or in the way they want to be loved? And isn’t love supposed to be about meeting somewhere in the middle?

I don’t have all the answers. Maybe love is also about embracing these disappointments, about realizing that imperfection exists even in our purest bonds. Maybe it’s about choosing to keep showing up, even when we feel misunderstood.

Because at the end of the day, love is not a transaction—it’s a journey of learning, unlearning, and trying again.

So, I pause and leave you with this thought: When your love doesn’t feel enough for someone you care about, do you stop trying—or do you keep finding new ways to show it?

Related: Stop Expecting Others to Understand You: A Self-Reflection on Peace and Happiness