Jealousy A Perplexed Emotion comes out of a lack of trust; lack of trust in the process of life, in your partner, in yourself. Lack of trust breeds insecurity, insecurity creates vague stories in your mind, which creates uncomfortable feelings and we stifle these feelings seeking more information, facts to overcome and validate.
As a sufferer of this intense negative emotion it’s not easy for your mind to achieve calmness. You get clouded and are left with depleted energy to face anything in a positive light of mind.
“Since the dawn of time, jealousy has been as prevalent an emotion as love.”
Jealousy- The Green-eyed Monster
Jealousy is a central and common theme in many films, fiction (Shakespeare called it the green-eyed monster), and other art forms throughout history. Biblically, jealousy is a common narrative, too. Think about Cain and Abel, the two sons of Adam. Cain killed his younger brother in a jealous rage.
Perhaps not quite as romantic to talk about or express if you possess it, but it is inevitably something we all feel—to some degree—but prefer to keep silent about. When we become consumed with the pervading idea that we lack things, we slowly become blind to what we already have, and we become ungrateful for those gifts.
Jealousy A Perplexed Emotion Triggers from Subconscious Emotions
Jealousy could be triggered from many subconscious emotions like low self esteem, a general tendency to be moody, anxious, and emotionally unstable, feelings of insecurity and possessiveness, hypothetical jealousy-inducing scenarios, coping mechanism to feelings of inadequacy in your relationship, an anxious attachment.
What is the story you tell yourself?
Let’s stop defining jealousy, either resentment of someone enjoying success or advantage, or the fear of losing something you feel is yours (rightly or wrongly) to someone else.
Jealousy is an anticipatory emotion. It seeks to prevent loss. When you feel this emotion, your mind starts to create a fear story of losing someone you love to someone.
Stories like “Maybe he’ll fall in love with his bubbly receptionist and leave me,” “She’s going to lunch with her ex-boyfriend, obviously she’s still attracted to him,” “He’ll come home and tell me he wants a divorce,” “Obviously she’ll get the promotion! She is such a brown noser…” Whatever movie we have created in our heads, we will always find people or situations to support our story.
Related Article: A PERSON’S BEHAVIOR IS A REFLECTION OF THEIR INTERNAL STRUGGLE!
Partners Experiencing Unwarranted Jealousy
You should realize that your partner’s jealousy isn’t about you; it’s about them. Respond to expressions of jealousy by reassuring your partner of your love. Research has shown that those who respond to partners’ jealousy by reassuring them of their interest and attraction tend to have more stable relationships.
Why does our complex mind make us believe that we are unlovable and soon our partner will cheat on us? What is at the core of our jealous feelings?
No one wants a jealous partner, sibling, colleague, or friend—and nobody enjoys feeling jealous or living out his or her jealousy with bizarre and hurtful behavior.
“Nothing can ruin a relationship faster than jealousy.”
We all know this and we all want to escape this complex emotion, still we end up experiencing it sometime in our life.
Be More Intelligent and Conscious towards this complex Emotion.
Solution 1: COMMUNICATION. Be emotionally intelligent with yourself first and those that are important to you, because no one can read your mind. If you are feeling jealous, be open with yourself about your intentions.
Very often we are unaware of what is going on subconsciously. It is up to you to find the root of your insecurity and then address it. Don’t hide what it is—it doesn’t have to be a deep secret that you carry.
Best relationships are built on good strong communications. Both partners should be open to discuss insecurities and understand the vulnerability and help each other validate their feelings with correct information to help them overcome this.
Solution 2: TRUST. Jealousy comes out of a lack of trust; lack of trust in the process of life, in your partner, in yourself. Lack of trust breeds insecurity, which creates jealousy. It’s a vicious circle, and as long as our thoughts and energy are clearly focused on what we could lose, that is exactly what will happen. This is the cold hard truth about jealousy: It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Trust needs efforts, time and commitment. One need to invest in each other, nurture the insecurities with love and reassurance of the commitment that one shares with each other.
Solution 3: TAKE ACTION. It is paramount that we prevent ourselves from fixating on what we don’t have and rather shift our perspective to the fact that our desires can and are revealing themselves through our daily actions.
What we desire should be a source of inspiration, which provides us with the power, motivation, and ability to work toward and manifest (no matter how big or small).
If the green-eyed monster shows his face, remember that jealousy can be an extraordinarily powerful tool if we use it to propel ourselves to get what we most desire. Instead of being afflicted with envy, rather use this powerful energy of envy to help you work towards what will actually bring you more of what you desire and less of what you feel you lack.
Emotions are simply something we experience, but we do not have to become them. See the jealousy as a signal that something in you warrants your awareness, bring it to your consciousness and use it to bring about positive change; be it in your relationships with yourself or those you hold dearest to you.
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