Self Indulgence
Our desires are never gratified by indulgence, on the other hand, with indulgence, they only flame up like fire.
We all our driven by some kind of impulse which we can’t control.
A compulsive update on Facebook, buying stuff which we really don’t need, just one more drink even though we’re past our limit, an urge to check our phones ping to check an incoming email or Whats App text, even if we involved in something else.
Giving into these impulses is always justified by our own excuses. But somewhere these excuses are leading to our own destruction.
“Destruction” might sound harsh. But the compulsive behavior of our indulgence to our impulses is ruining our life.
A self indulgent way of life is creating our lack of self-control. There’s a tremendous cost for this lifestyle: It’s destroying our future.
You create big things in future, when you delay gratification in the present.
For every small things, your temptation to indulge in your desires will stop you from achieving your big goals in life.
This is true no matter what you want to create.
The writer who spends hours mindlessly surfing the net has no time or inspiration left to write.
A student who want to achieve good scores cant give into the temptation of being hooked up to YouTube videos, Instagram chats. They need to leave these impulses to get involved with upgrading and brushing their skills to achieve good scores.
The husband who compulsively looks at pornography loses interest in an intimate relationship with his wife.
Family members who stay glued to their phones during dinner lose their ability to interact meaningfully with one another.
Self indulgence exhausts the energy you need in order to get what you want out of life.
Giving into your impulses drains you drip by drip.
Historically, this process was seen as the work of the devil in his role as “tempter”.
He seduces you with small pleasures, does brain fogging and you slowly lose the will power to resist the enticements and then you start to give in time and time again, paying the price of this short term gratification.
Unfortunately, we have moved from a culture of self-sacrifice and self-discipline to one of pure, unfettered self-indulgence.
Self control has become rare as the current circumstances bombard us with all the urges to gratify our desires.
All our advertising is forced at us with urges and desires of thirst and hunger and to have more.
From “Coke adds life” to Lays-where “No one can eat just one”. To tempt to Thumbs Up-“Kuch toofani kartey hain” to Durex Love Sex-“Feeling is everything”. And to justify all impulses-“Men will be Men”
These messages influence us, but they can’t take away our will to resist.
Let’s experience-what happens when we attempt to restrain our urges. Try this:
- Take yourself back to a state of craving you experienced. Feel the insatiable hunger driving you to get whatever it is you want.
- Now imagine holding back forbidding yourself from getting what you want.
- Notice what your reaction is, how does it feel to be denied the thing you want so badly.
When we do Self-restrain-
We feel sad, anxious, frustrated or angry. We would be startled if we consciously observe that how painful it is when we deprive ourselves.
But consciously if we start observing and stop ourselves to give into little indulgences like an extra slice of cake, or having one extra cup of tea or buying something online compulsively.
Initially, momentarily we resist, but slowly we will overcome and forget what we even wanted at first place.
At times in relationships also we get into trap of falling into wrong relationships just because of an impulse, desire or our deep hidden needs.
The only way to overcome self indulgence is to practice self restrain on your immediate desires.
Self denial is painful and at times difficult. Subconsciously we are mechanized to the response of giving into our impulses as it gives instant gratification.
This overwhelmed feeling of pleasure stops us from self restrain as our mind is trained that denial means intense grief and anxiety.
To overcome this we need to be more conscious.
Deprivation opens a portal into more life.
Not only can you tolerate it, its the pathway to living more fully than you ever thought possible.
Once you can live through it, deprivation frees you from being enslaved to your impulses. Then you take charge of your life and you know when to draw line.
We need to bring the focus from outside world to more to our inner soul to liberate ourselves.
Denial would not be easy, we still remain focused on it, wishing we could have it and feel robbed of it. This keeps us fixated.
To break this we need to involve ourselves to something more interesting which keeps us busy or we need to practice meditation to bring balance and stability.
Read: MY EXPERIENCE OF DEEP SILENCE WITH MY INNER SELF!
When we simply look inward, we learn the art to resist.
Our inner void is an empty space that gives us the freedom to be calm.
When you start enjoying this void within you, you will unleash the endless possibility of creative energy flowing through you.
Very good post about self indulgence. Nicely written. Keep up the good work.